During the last few weeks it has been hard to write. I feel as if my mind is in the doldrums. Off and on something has come to mind but today I feel blank.
I know that happens to most of us but it is frustrating. I want to write but can’t think of what to say. Oh well, I will just say shelter from the cold if you are in a cold place and enjoy the weather if you are where the temperatures and comfortable.
Maybe I will have something more logical to say tomorrow.
I have gotten better about some things as I have aged. On Friday I will turn 79 years young. The year before eighty. It seems like a milestone. It has made me think about the things I really can do something about and came up with this list.
These are the things that I have some control over. Anything else is not something I need to worry about, stew over or waste time on.
Now the only things I need to do is to stick to this list.
Today I find myself leaning on my faith. I have some medical issues which may resolve…or not. Time will tell. This news did not send me into a panic…at least not yet. I have high hopes that this will be an easy fix and life will go on pretty much as normal.
In the meantime I will continue my routines and keep my anxiety at bay. I am grateful that I have some tools that I have made a habit and can actually count on them to help.
Life is always interesting and challenges us in many ways but it is worth cherishing. Keep me in your thought and prayers as I travel into this joourney.
Life is never boring. I wondered why I was so warm and checked the thermostat and it is way warm in the house. Obviously the air conditioner is out again. Oh well, it will cool down to the 60’s tonight and we can get cool again. We have a friend who fixes air and he will come tomorrow and see what’s up. At least this time we don’t have company.
It seems like you can never get ahead. That is the negative side. The positive side is that I think we can manage to pay for a new one. The only problem is that we are retired and on fixed income. We have just finished repairing the bathroom and here we are again. We suspect that the air conditioner has died a natural death. It is, in fact, very old. There are two ways of looking at everything. Hopefully this will be something that my sense of humor can cover….in the future but not right now.
Naturally the upcoming week is showing highs in the 80’s instead of the slightly cool temps we had last week. Also it is so humid the air feels thick. Until Thursday it will not cool much at night so little chance to bring the inside temp down.
There! I have had my rant for the day. Life goes on and I am actually grateful for so many things that this is just a bump in the road. I will put my gratitude list on my mirror and read it every day.
We have reached the brave new world.
Problems with various vendors of services can be complicated to resolve. This week I received a water bill for two months for over $2900.00. Yep you read that right. They are saying we used that much water for two months. Since our bill is usually less than $100.00 this is very interesting. They told my husband that there must be a leak but we can guarantee there is no leak. The only possible place for this would be between the house and the meter and since my husband mows with a very heavy lawn mower he would have been mowing through a flood. The water for out home is from a well and the only usage of that water is a rented guest house with two people who are never home. That is one aggravation we will continue to work on.
The second is my husband no longer uses his phone connected with Verizon and today I tried to get in touch with them. First I tried to sign in. It doesn’t recognize my sign-on, my phone number, or my password. Since all of this is stored in a program called Password Safe I know it is all correct. It would not let me change anything with the usual “have you forgotten?” message. At that point I tried to find a phone number for them and after searching on their web site gave up and found the number on Google. Called it and listened to music for 30 minutes. I will go the the store across town to straighten it all out. Such fun!
Why is nothing ever easy? I suppose it is because it is all automated and you can’t talk to a real person. If you do manage to get one they don’t speak English. It’s a whole new world.
Tonight is a little bit hard to write. I am hoping that on Monday we will have countertops for the bathroom. They have failed to be here several times and it makes me doubt that they will be here on Monday.
Life continues to throw sadness at me. A friend of my husband’s has died. I know that both of us are feeling how fleeting life is. As we get older and is sometimes difficult to face the fact that you have few years left in front of you.
But most of the time that’s not what I think about. Most of the time I like to think about what can be done. What things can I do? How can I give someone a smile or a helping hand. Those are the things that seem to make my life worthwhile at this point.
Each time I can do something for someone there is a warmth that washes over me. I know that this is where my joy lies.There is nothing that can take away your own worries or sadness more than being of help to someone else.
Not concentrating on yourself but thinking of others doesn’t allow thinking about yourself. Be of help to someone today. It will be the best help for you.
Today I am again using the Dragon software so forgive any grammar errors.
This has been a quiet day. I did have to attend the funeral of the young man with children who died. The funeral was a real tribute to him. There must’ve been at least 300 people there. Sad though it was his funeral was a celebration of his life.
There is always something so much sadder about the death of a young person. We feel as if there are things that are unfinished. Someone told me many years ago that in truth the death of a young person is not a life unfinished. That each of us has our own lifespan. It is a lifespan set for us alone. For some reason that gave me comfort.
Death is something that we all come to. It is something that we all have to face. Many people fear death. For me death itself is not frightening. It is the dying that we don’t look forward to.
There are so many things in life that can frighten us. For those of us who suffer with anxiety it seems that we can be afraid of almost anything. Although I think each of us has certain things that trigger our anxiety. I know that some things that might disturb me might not be bothersome at all to someone else. I think each of us has to discover what are the things that set us off.
Over time with help we can learn management of our own triggers. The thing is we have to practice and keep up by exercising those tools frequently. If we think we can just use them when we are in a panic it won’t work. I think that is the hardest part. Reminding ourselves daily to meditate or pray or whatever it is that works for us to use it. Consistency is the answer.
No matter what we have to keep on going, keep on working, keep on hoping, and keep on living.
Today after having my arm continue to not work and my husband having nausea and extra low blood sugar I have decided that the only thing left to post today is this song.
Hope you enjoy it as much as I do. When things are really crazy this lifts me up.
Life continues to be interesting. This morning my Keurig quit. I use a golf cart to work in the yard. it is my workhorse. It wouldn’t go this morning and the cart that I hook to it has a ruined tire. I guess I should be happy since I have no plan to do yard work without it but there are things that need doing. Fortunately I have another coffee maker so life continues. Also my computer has gone to the hospital and I am using my laptop which I am poor at typing on so please forgive any flubs. Hopefully nothing else will go wrong.
We have been told that next week countertops that are slowing any more progress on our bathroom will be installed next Tuesday. So we sit with nothing being done until next week. The good new is the rest will be done quickly??? I hope.
Someone recently questioned me why “at my age” I would do things like Community Conferencing, Mediations or other volunteering when I could be playing bridge or joining clubs. What a question! I believe that “at my age” we should be giving back with what we have gained through living this life. I explained that to them….probably to no avail. Oh well, I tried.
Do you want to worry? I am sure if you try hard enough you can find something. I know that I can. I am having some medical issues that may be nothing or something. That is enough for me to stress about. Logic goes out the window.
I will, however, step back and remember the things I need to do to keep the worry in check. When it comes to health no amount of worry can change anything so it is wasted time. Will everything else going on time wasting is not an option.
Soooo back to meditation, positive thinking, prayer and spending time with those I love. What works for you when you are worried?
worry-less-journey 