God weeps

There are many kinds of Christians. We are divided into so many denominations that I don’t think I could come close to naming them all. Even amongst denominations there is dissension. Most religions have people who see their faith in different ways. As a Christian it is interesting to me how we can spend as much time being upset about other Christians than we are about other faiths. We are busy telling others what they are doing wrong.

kim

We know from history that there have been many wars fought over religion. It is sad that our perception of God can divide us so. Most faiths have  extremists. It is certainly true of Christianity and it is obvious to us in Islam. Interestingly enough some of the ideas of Muslim and Christian extremists and the same. I don’t know that I have ever met a Buddhist extremist but I guess it is possible. How much damage is done in the name of religion.

God must weep over our ignorance and obstinance. We want to force our ideas on others. After all, what we believe has to be right! Why can’t we accept that we don’t all think alike or believe the same things?

god weeps(side note: I have just discovered that spell check doesn’t know the words amongst and obstinance)

We will never have peace in the world as long as we want everyone to think that same. We are not robots. God created us to be individuals.

Commitment? Why?

loyalSomeone talked with me recently about what it is like to have been married 55 years. This made me think about the differences in relationships today. Marriage has become a maybe situation. I think some people are marrying for the wedding. It is amazing what people will spend.

Some people are choosing not to marry and just live together. There seems to no longer be a moral issue in this decision. I wish I would live long enough to see how many relationships last as long as 55 years. When someone asked me that question I started to think about what we gain from being married so long. I wish there were a word different than “love” to express what happens in a long term marriage. Knowing that the Greeks divided love into 6 categories I looked it up and found it in YES Magazine.

  1. Eros – sexual love
  2. Philia – friendship
  3. Ludus – playful love
  4. agape – love of all mankind (God’s love)
  5. Philautia – self love (divided into two kinds; healthy and unhealthy}
  6. Pragma –Another Greek love was the mature love known as pragma. This was the deep understanding that developed between long-married couples. Pragma was about making compromises to help the relationship work over time, and showing patience and tolerance.The psychoanalyst Erich Fromm said that we expend too much energy on “falling in love” and need to learn more how to “stand in love.” Pragma is precisely about standing in love—making an effort to give love rather than just receive it. With about a third of first marriages in the U.S. ending through divorce or separation in the first 10 years, the Greeks would surely think we should bring a serious dose of pragma into our relationships.

faithfulThat was so perfectly put that I couldn’t have done any better. The only thing left out is the rewards of this kind of love and it is that I have ALL of those loves at one time. All of these have been enhanced over the years by the understanding and commitment given to me. We have been through good times and bad, anger and acceptance, joy and sorrow and so much more both bad and good. Yet we have stood the test of time. Our love is deep beyond expressing and even death will not change it.

What is your fear?

I have just finished reading When Breath Becomes Air. This is a wonderful book written by a neurosurgeon/neuroscientist on his journey toward death. It is not as sad as you might imagine. He has spent his life searching for meaning and has multiple degrees from medicine to English. The book is full of wonderful thoughts about life.

Dying seems to be the thing that haunts us.Not existing is unimaginable. We can’t begin to imagine ourselves absent.There are cultures that live closer to it’s reality and have less difficulty. We love youth in this culture.Death is not acceptable. This brings to mind again those who want to be immortal. What arrogance? 

Somehow having a beginning and an end feels right. I wish that we could turn loose of our fears. After all as FDR said “There is nothing to fear but fear itself.” Most of us who struggle with anxiety and fear are usually not thinking about death but whatever triggers our fears.We truly see fear as the enemy……maybe not death.

This is where our faith and faith community are so important. We need the love and care to hold us up. It can be the difference in our lives.

Life Happens

life hThere are some days that “you should’a staid in bed.” This was one of those days. Part of my schedule was to pick up a friend who was having some minor surgery done and take her home. I like to listens to books on my Kindle in the car….wellllll my Kindle had no charge. I popped a small charger on it and left the house early so I wouldn’t be late. I arrived in plenty of time to discover that I was at the wrong doctor’s office. I took out my phone…..which I had removed from the charger in my house…..and guess what? My phone wasn’t charged.

I quickly got in the car and plugged the phone in to call another office to find her. She was only a couple of blocks away. Actually got there on time. She had been given a mild sedative before the surgery which was to relax her only. Wellllll it knocked her out. She slept all the way home. I questioned her about meals and she managed to tell me that she had food. Her husband is 90 something and has a caregiver with him. When we got to her house I had to get the caregiver to help me get her into the house…..we put her in a gown and she immediately fell asleep. Checking her refrigerator I could find nothing that would do for dinner so I made a trip to the grocery to get a prepared meal for dinner. Leaving her house the low gas light came on in my car and I had to quickly find a gas station.

Understand the plan was to pick her and take her home. About an hour to do this. Having left home at 10:30 I arrived back home at 2:30. . No lunch for me.

faith_tells_me no matter lies ahead god already there v1 designLong story and funny in retrospect. It just shows that things don’t go as planned. Sometimes we just have to take things as they come. Life is irregular. God, after all, did not tell us everything would go smoothly. He just said he would be with us. He was certainly by my side today. I wasn’t the least bit anxious and just rolled with the flow. When she is fully rational I will share the funny story with her.

Patience? Really?

patience 1We have weathered Irma and are more or less back to normal. Our son, daughter-in-law and kids have been with us for two days since they still had no power. They left tonight and it is nice to feel back to normal.

The time spent in the last week has made me realize just how attached we are to routine. when we are forced out of our normal pattern we become (at least in my case) anxious and disoriented. I like my routine…especially in the morning. If something disrupts that then nothing seems to go well the whole day.

There are so many times that we are tested by circumstances beyond out control. Life definitely does not always run smoothly. It is the changes that challenge us. We have to adapt to the new circumstances like it or not. The thing is that adaptation takes time and we want things to be good immediately. Our society has expectations of everything being done RIGHT NOW!

At one time I worked for a group of pediatricians and a sick child would be given a prescription in the morning and in the afternoon the mother would call and want to know why the child wasn’t well. (absolutely true story.. and it didn’t happen just once.)

peacefulWe need to relearn patience….the ability to let things resolve in their own time. Life doesn’t run on our schedule. We cannot expect instant gratification.

Learn to sit and wait.

Compassion is Healing

moment to moment

I think that one of the hardest things to learn about anxiety is the up and down of it. One moment everything is fine and then something is said and or learned and there you are again…dealing with anxiousness. Life is such as gift it is not right to waste it. I don’t know how someone lives in  a country like Israel not knowing when your life might be wiped out. I guess you must learn to live with it. There is no other choice.

It is so hard to keep up with the meditation, prayer and yoga that I am using to learn a new path. It is so easy to put it off and say I’ll do it tomorrow. The thing is that it helps when I follow through. How dumb is that to put it off?

Usually I stay away from the news as being too violent and depressing but now with the North Korea situation it is hard to shut it out. What sort of world are we leaving for our children and grandchildren?

compassion

We are all humans dwelling on this planet. Will we ever learn kindness and love toward one another?. Sometimes I wonder if anyone has ever read with a real listening heart the words of Christ. There is no part of his life that was not concentrated on getting us to practice compassion.

 

compasssion-2Compassion is a unique thing. I am not sure that we really understand it until we have lived long enough to have encountered hardship and tragedy in our own lives. With that experience we can really feel the pain of others. If we use this experience to reach out to others in their pain we are a healing voice in the world.

This is Hard

This is a difficult post. How do you go about posting that the last week was a big backslide. Unfortunately, as I said earlier, interventions to prevent or at least decrease anxiety have to be in place before we are hit with the thing that pushes us over. Anxiety rampant is falling into a deep black hole. All things around you fade our of existence and the thing running life is anxiety. This is no way to live. Drugs given by physicians can help and may be the only thing when we are close to the edge and teetering over. But in the main there has to be some way to learn a new way of living. Even though backsliding was the result this week I will not falter and and am going to keep on moving forward.

There is one thing for sure….keeping on can’t hurt.impossible