Losing Freedom

One of my favorite writers https://earthwalkingworld.wordpress.com/2019/11/16/let-the-looting-begin/   began his post today talking about the freedom we achieve when we are first able to drive. I would like to talk about the opposite problem

As we grow older our ability to drive can decline. Whether it is due to vision, slowed reaction time or mental losses we may have to stop driving. In many European countries this is not such an issue since public transportation can take someone anywhere. Those who live in city centers can walk many places and if they are able to do that don’t lost that freedom.

innovation in aging

For most of us who live in the US driving is our key to mobility and therefore our independence. The hardest thing to convince us as we age is that we can no longer drive. For those who have enough money to Uber everywhere it may not be a problem but the majority can’t do that.

For those who live alone losing the ability to drive can cause isolation which leads to depression and going downhill. I wish there were a simple solution but there really isn’t one. As the age of our population increases the problem will become more acute.

Creating a volunteer group of drivers who would be willing to help people run their errands and be with friends would be a good solution. I wonder if anyone has done this if so I haven’t heard of it. I hope someone does it in the future.

Memories and emotions

Where families are involved life can treacherous. Sometimes the most innocent remark can be twisted into a major conflict. I suspect this is because there is history and much emotion involved. Often the negative reaction has nothing to do with what is going on at the moment. It is rooted somewhere in the past where the emotions are stuck.

feelings-of-mind-connected-to-heart-original-imaew2m8hpyzhrcu (1)

I have never forgotten that our emotions are tied to so many things. A piece of music from our past can have us experiencing the emotions we felt at the time. These past connections can emerge at the worst moments and skew our perception of the current experience.

Many of us have been taken straight back to our past feelings by a song, a scent, a person, or a scene. We don’t realize what is happening and our responses are not appropriate to the moment. This is doubly true for those we spent a lot of time with growing up. We are creations of our environment as well as our genes.

family breakup

It takes real strength to look inside and connect with the past so that we can disconnect ourselves from it. Most of us don’t want to relive the negative things that formed out emotional responses. It make take talking with a counselor to root out those emotions and at least understand them. Hopefully doing so will allow us to reconnect with those we have turned away from. Maybe not. Some we may not want to but there can be some that can heal connections that will change our hearts.

We are a whole being

For years the common thinking among physicians was that anxiety and depression caused digestive symptoms such as IBS, constipation, diarrhea and possibly even Crohn’s Disease or Ulcerative Colitis. Now the pendulum is falling the other way. the Brain/Gut connection is becoming more important in treating people with such problems. I have long realized that my IBSD causes anxiety and if bad enough depression. I am glad that treating the whole person is becoming part of how medicine thinks.

gut-brain-relationship-600x300

We are definitely complex beings and anything that affects us physically or mentally cannot be separated out into one or the other. Physicians have divided up into specialties and seem to focus on that area. It is understandable as medicine has become so complex. You can’t know everything about everything. We need a different specialty the “wholeness doctor” who tries to put the pieces together. I know that there are now DO’s and other categories of people who look more at the whole person but we need more of it.

I hope that in the future we have those physicians who take the information from all of the specialists and put it all together. This is what Internists would like to do but getting the reports and information from other doctors is like pulling teeth. This has to be worked out also.

the-whole-is-greater

 

 

We are not parts stuck together but a whole just waiting to be understood.

 

Hallothankhanuchris and more is coming!

Cooler weather. Autumn is finally showing up in the south. We really don’t get much cooler until December/January but this 73 feels great. The real key is that is it cooler at night. During the summer (that includes September) the nights seldom go below the high 70″s.

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For those of us who thrive with sunlight we are heading into the dark. Sometimes that can be sad. Having our updated bathroom done except for the shower door helps. I don’t feel as discombobulated.  I will try to get outdoors more during the light and that helps too.

It seems as if we are getting ready for a holiday called Hallothankhanuchris. There are decorations in the stores for all three days at once. Can’t we just savor each one? They really try to squeeze the holidays to make money. I am not sure that we take the time to appreciate each of them.

Halloween is related All Hallows Eve remembering those saints and others who have passed on. It is believed that it originated when Christianity met Celtic celebrations. Christianity has had a history of incorporating local traditions to help people move to the Christian beliefs.  It is followed by All Saints celebrated by many Christian denominations.

Many holidays are connected to our faith traditions. However, too often, the commercial aspects end up taking over the holiday with most people today not thinking at all about where Halloween comes from and Santa has taken over Christmas/Hanukkah.

holidays

 

I find this sad. Each of the major faiths have wonderful celebrations and I wish we could appreciate them in all of their meaning.

 

Never easy…did progress??? help?

brave new worldWe have reached the brave new world.

Problems with various vendors of services can be complicated to resolve. This week I received a water bill for two months for over $2900.00. Yep you read that right. They are saying we used that much water for two months. Since our bill is usually less than $100.00 this is very interesting. They told my husband that there must be a leak but we can guarantee there is no leak. The only possible place for this would be between the house and the meter and since my husband mows with a very heavy lawn mower  he would have been mowing through a flood. The water for out home is from a well and the only usage of that water is a rented guest house with two people who are never home. That is one aggravation we will continue to work on.

The second is my husband no longer uses his phone connected with Verizon and today I tried to get in touch with them. First I tried to sign in. It doesn’t recognize my sign-on, my phone number, or my password. Since all of this is stored in a program called Password Safe I know it is all correct. It would not let me change anything with the usual “have you forgotten?” message. At that point I tried to find a phone number for them and after searching on their web site gave up and found the number on Google. Called it and listened to music for 30 minutes. I will go the the store across town to straighten it all out. Such fun!

aggravations (1)

Why is nothing ever easy? I suppose it is because it is all automated and you can’t talk to a real person. If you do manage to get one they don’t speak English. It’s a whole new world.

Two worlds

The Two Worlds

 

Gonefront porch

Summer nights

Gentle breeze

Smelling grass

New mown

 

Seeking cool

Savoring twilight

Resting outside

Quiet after day

 

Life is sweet

Neighbors close

Porch swings rocking

Voices mingling

 

Time for friends

Chatting simply

No distractions

Evening settling

 

Time past

Slower, calmer

In tune

With the earth

 

Here

Digital_Family_8727682_H

Today’s time

Faster, hurried

Evening coming

Unnoticed

 

Media blaring

Phones beeping

Family each

In confined space

 

Digital_Family_8727682_H

Conversation?

On line

Can’t see

Faces

 

No listening

Mind cluttered

Little calm

New world

 

Choose!

Life goes on

Life continues to be interesting. This morning my Keurig quit. I use a golf cart to work in the yard. it is my workhorse. It wouldn’t go this morning and the cart that I hook to it has a ruined tire. I guess I should be happy since I have no plan to do yard work without it but there are things that need doing. Fortunately I have another coffee maker so life continues. Also my computer has gone to the hospital and I am using my laptop which I am poor at typing on so please forgive any flubs. Hopefully nothing else will go wrong.

what else

We have been told that next week countertops that are slowing any more progress on our bathroom will be installed next Tuesday. So we sit with nothing being done until next week. The good new is the rest will be done quickly??? I hope.

Someone recently questioned me why “at my age” I would do things like Community Conferencing, Mediations or other volunteering when I could be playing bridge or joining clubs. What a question! I believe that “at my age” we should be giving back with what we have gained through living this life. I explained that to them….probably to no avail. Oh well, I tried.

 

Where are we headed?

Today I wrote on my other blog about the erosion of Christianity happening in our society. This erosion is also true in other areas of our lives. We have already lost so much of our moral sense and what behavior is acceptable.

Never-let-society-determine-the-direction-of-your-moral-compass.

Rudeness and uncaring have become the order of the day. Anger is rampant. We have a society of entitlement and very little else matters.

Our media is violent, making us tolerant of almost any kind of atrocity. The news is biased to the point of the ridiculous. In fact it should not be called news but opinion. Children have to be taught that what they hear and see must be scrutinized carefully to determine its veracity. Most of them accept what they see and hear as true.

Our government is corrupt and careless of their behavior but quick to accuse opponents of the exact same thing. Hollywood idols lead youth into imitating their behavior.

moral-compass

The frightening thing is what to do. How do we turn things around and bring sanity and moral fibre (moral fibre (Britain) The inner strength to do what one believes to be right; often an ability to make difficult decisions.) back to our country? I wish I had an answer. Yet, I am one and I will continue to make my voice heard whether heeded or not. That is all that there is.

“Act as if”

why_holding_a_grudge_can_ruin_your_health_600xSometimes it is difficult to let go of a grudge against someone. Over time our church has had difficulties and unfortunately we (my husband and I) tend to feel some of them were because of some bad decisions on the part of someone.

We have struggled with this and know it is time to let it go. However just deciding that and actually doing it are two different things. I read something years ago that we don’t really let go until we can think about the issue without emotion

Act-as-if.

We will work on that. I like to use “act as if” to help change a pattern or habit so I will begin to “act as if” there are no feelings attached to this. Eventually it will go away.

“Act as if” works really well for lots of things. If I am feeling down I will try to act happy. Many times it works. Just setting your mind to change things can make a real difference.

Try it!

Do I live in the same time?

impatience downloadYes, life continues to surprise and challenge. The tile is finished in the bathroom and looks great. The vanity is in (sans sinks) and now we wait for the countertop people to come and make a template. We thought that would go quickly but not so. They will be here next week and will take a week to make the countertops. Oh well. That means at least two to three more weeks until we are done. I just want to run away until it is over. Anyone for a three week cruise? Not happening since all our saving was for the bathroom.

Patience….the magic word. I knew this would take time but I didn’t expect this long. Of course the hurricane didn’t help. We lost a week.

Patience…..something I am not noted for.

DevopsCertified

We live in a world where everything seems to happen immediately. Reaching friends and family on cell phones means we can get them FAST. If they don’t respond we are upset. If we get an illness we expect to get a medicine that will fix it NOW! We don’t do well with waiting.

accelerating-clock

When I was young things were slower. We were less impatient over minor things and didn’t expect everything to be done immediately. We could be impatient but the timeline was much different. I think we were less stressed Sometimes I feel as if I have been transported to a world where time is sped up. Some kind of alternative universe.