Sometimes I forget to not leap ahead of myself but just concentrate on one thing at a time. Getting one thing done feels good. When I do I stop obsessing on the things not done.
A long time ago I worked for a company that handled case management for insurance companies. As nurses, we reviewed medical information and (the company was a good one) usually recommended doing the right thing. It costs less in the long run and that was how we explained it backing it up with figures.
While there a huge caseload was brought on to do with workers compensation from the state of Texas. I was handed that account. It was overwhelming. The amount of files on my desk was tremendous and daunting. After struggling with how to handle it I took the files and adjusted by date it came in and status of the patient. I stacked them up that way and just pulled one at a time. It was amazing how much I was able to get done once I stopped obsessing over how much there was.
Now as I face dealing with my husband’s medical issues I have realized that I have to do the same thing. Instead of worrying (useless) I have evaluated what needs to be done in what order and have started contacting doctors ect., setting appointments and moving ahead. We will solve things one at a time.
In one of my journals I found this note. I think it was a quote but I don’t know from who (or is it whom?). “When we see a star we are seeing time.” That star’s light is coming from long ago. What we are seeing is actually gone.
It is so amazing to think that what we are seeing is not happening in our time. The scientists of our day have talked about time. It truly is a mystery. There are days when time seems to fly and times where it drags. Time for us is flexible. It has to do with the mind. When I was at work I always wanted to be doing something. A bad day was when time dragged.
This covid crisis has been time out of time. I wonder what we have learned. I see many families experiencing things that they haven’t done in a long time …if ever. I hope that meaning is found in those experiences and that they remember joy found in this different time.
In my youth I envisioned the future as a wonderful place, Peace, flying cars, visiting space. That idea is gone. Have the changes made a better world or one more frightening, more dangerous, more ominous? My memories make it seem that way. When will we ever learn what really matters?
My past is a dream
A life of summer days
Hide under desks
With fear of A bomb
Air raid shelters
That did not
Dim our hope
Of a better world
Free from fear
Time moved on
Electronics, VHS, DVD’s
A better world?
My memory world
The better world
There is no greater disaster in the spiritual life than to be immersed in unreality, for life is maintained and nourished in us by our vital relation with realities outside and above us.” C.S. Lewis.
Lewis is so right but not just about our spiritual life. Living in unreality is a disaster in every way. It touches us on every level. I impact our physical self. No matter our level of activity it is not the same as it was. Even how and what we eat has been impacted.
Our emotional/psychological life has been impacted. We can’t do the things we used to do. Our social interactions have been curtailed. Whether we are introverts or extroverts this is still a change. I am sure that everyone is feeling this distancing in some way. I used to be an extreme extrovert but in my latter years I am more in the middle. This change has affected me in many ways. I miss the touch of others, the face to face exchange of ideas, the fun of simple conversation. I am lonely.
Our spiritual life has most assuredly been impacted. In some ways mine has expanded in that I spend more quiet time and intense connection with God that I have in quite a while. There are not so many distractions. I miss the camaraderie of our church community in addition to the services themselves.
This time has created a different way of being. One that can either strengthen or break us. We have to maintain perspective. Though maybe months distant there will be a change. The view will be changed making us find a new path into the world as it emerges. We have the ability to blend into the new world around us and adapt and make it better.
Part of my nightly prayer from the New Zealand Prayer Book: Night Prayer says:
The night heralds the dawn.Let us look expectantly to a new day,new joys,new possibilities.
May we all do so with enthusiasm and creativity.
Science doesn’t know the answer to this question. None of us do. There are some ideas and some speculations but no proof. I was thinking about that when I wrote this.
Nothing the same
Toward an end
Today in church we celebrated the Epiphany…the bringing of light into the world. The read date is the 9th but we did it today. I am addicted to light. It influences how I feel. I enjoy the months when we have the most light. That doesn’t mean that I don’t enjoy the night. One without the other would be meaningless.
This started me thinking of all the idioms that use the word light. See if you can come up with these. Have fun!
This is a wonderful list of how to help families with sick children!
Before I continue our story I want to share more on how you can help. In the last few years between NICU, RSV/Adenovirus/Pneumonia stay, and this most recent round of hospital time, it has occurred to me most people don’t know how to help. Most people ask “Let me know if I can do anything”, […]
via My Guide to Helping Families with a Child in the Hospital — MommaInTheMountains with Intentionally Healthy Inc
During the last few weeks it has been hard to write. I feel as if my mind is in the doldrums. Off and on something has come to mind but today I feel blank.
I know that happens to most of us but it is frustrating. I want to write but can’t think of what to say. Oh well, I will just say shelter from the cold if you are in a cold place and enjoy the weather if you are where the temperatures and comfortable.
Maybe I will have something more logical to say tomorrow.
Today I had to attend a class to re-certify as a mediator. The class was helpful and interesting but I realize I am no longer used to sitting in class all day. At one point I stood up for a while to just get out of the chair. We were given breaks but the first one was long in coming.
It is interesting when many things that you have done in life enrich whatever you are doing presently. I have noticed this happening several times in my life. It’s as if I am being prepared for the next thing to come. Today was mostly about listening, discovering what lies beneath problems, and helping to find common ground between people. I have used and taught communication skills many times in my life and this was mostly a endorsement of what I have already learned. I will be using it in a different way and learning that was helpful.
If we are truly living we are learning all the time. I don’t think a day goes by that I don’t learn something new. Maybe from TV or books or other people. It is interesting to think at the end of the day about what is new and how can you use it.
Nothing is ever wasted. As you age you learn something you thought was useless 10 years ago is just what you need now. Absorb everything you can in life and somehow it will be used.