Yesterday I realized that I was doing too much. The amount of paperwork involved in this move has been totally overwhelming. I was trying so hard to do everything that I was stressing myself beyond my ability to function. So I did the smart thing. I asked for help.
It is not unusual for any of us to think that we can take care of everything and that we don’t need help. “I can handle it!” We don’t want to feel weak or needy but each of us has a limit. We don’t want to ask for help but most of the time it is there if we ask.
My children willing pitched in and took a few of the tasks away and the relief was enormous. Just having a few things gone made a big difference.
We never want to ask for help. We want to be so independent but it is good to ask for help. People are usually very willing to do what they can. I know that I will help wherever I can and most people are the same. Don’t wait until you are at the end of the rope. Call for help and let someone pull you in.
It has been interesting to see on local world wide media that since the covid outbreak the environment seems to be improving. Some animal species that were on the way down are increasing. Animals that haven’t been seen in some area for quite a while are not being spotted.
Not only is wildlife changing but air quality, flora growth, and other indicators of positive change are happening. It is too bad that when this all dies down we will proceed to make these changes go away. I wish we could keep on causing improvements. I hope someone is smart enough to see this and point it out to the world at large. I am but one but I am one and I am saying keep this going!
Maybe if others join me we can star a whole new trend.
Today is better. Things are starting to iron out. My interventions this week bore fruit and I think we are on a good path.
I worry about those who have no idea how to navigate the medical system. It is getting more complex every day. Physicians want to stick to their specialties and no one wants to manage the whole person. Sometimes the Internal Medicine docs are the ones to do that but they also struggle with getting information from the specialists so they are frustrated too.
I wish I knew what need to be done but things are getting worse every day. I really do think that the insurance companies are a major part of the problem. They are telling the doctors what they can and cannot do. That makes no sense. I pray that something happens in the future to make this better.
If you are dealing with medical care find someone you know who understands it and ask for help. Most people are happy to help where they can.
This week has been a steady stream of doctor visits and tests. I’m afraid it will be that way until we can get answers for the leg pain that makes my husband’s life unbearable. We are making small steps forward. Xrays are on the way to the Mayo Clinic. I am afraid that it is unlikely that we will hear there is a physical problem with the implanted knee replacement. If we find that is the problem it will be related to an allergic reaction and that will take longer to prove.
If it is not that we will continue on the search for answers to make his life bearable.
When I left my job as a Parish Nurse I thought about becoming a “patient advocate” as a free service for those who need help. Now I am using those skills for my own husband. We will prevail!
Another Doctor visit today. One more step forward. Each one gives me a good feeling. At least we are getting things out of the way.
It is so frustrating to stay here day after day. I know that it is the same for everyone. Those of us who are risk will have to be careful for a good while. I am glad to see that some things are able to open and people will have jobs. To be out of work with lots of bills is a terrible place to be. My heart goes out to them. There are things that we can do to help. I hope you can find ways where you live to show caring. It is the most important thing to respect and have compassion for others. If everyone could do that the world would be a much better place.
During this crisis we have seen examples of caring and examples of selfishness. I hope the caring wins out.
I keep a quote book and was looking through it today and found one that I am sure must have been on someone’s blog but I just love it.
If you think you’re too small to make a difference, try sleeping with a mosquito. The Dalai Lama
Not only is this very true but I love his sense of humor.
Each of us lives a life of importance. Even though we are quarantined and distancing we are needed. It seems that there is not much that we can do to help but that is not true.
Yesterday I ordered groceries from the store and they were delivered by a family…father, mother, two young girls. There were driving a nice car….not expensive but good. Obviously the parents work and no longer have jobs. So many people have been laid off or the place they work is closed. This may be their only way to make money. At least when I order groceries delivered I can give them a generous tip since it all goes to them.
The restaurants near us that are supplying take-out food are having their wait staff deliver it. We can pick it up but the delivery helps someone who has no income at this time. I am spending so much less than usual I can surely space some for those in need.
Admittedly it is small help but it is help. So many people are in dire straits and we have no idea of knowing how this will turn out. If you are one of the blessed and have an income, a place to live, food to eat and safety please do what you can to help those who don’t have anything.
Most of us are suffering from cabin fever or worse. We so need human touch. For those of us who are completely alone it is a devastating time. It is easy to fall into periods of depression and anxiety. We are not meant to be alone. One of the worst punishments for prisoners is spending a long time in isolation.
I am going to suggest something that sounds totally ridiculous. You have to hug yourself. I am talking about physically putting your arms around yourself and squeezing tight. Stay that way for a while and repeat often. As strange as it seems it will help.
In life, we often want to help someone who doesn’t want help. Sometimes they are right. Sometimes trying to help is the wrong thing to do. But sometimes they genuinely need help and there are many reasons why they might refuse.
Pride can frequently get in the way of accepting help. Many of us were raised to believe that taking help obligates us to return the favor to the person who helped. Over the time that I have lived I have become a big proponent of “paying it forward.” We don’t have to be beholding to the specific person but we are called to help someone else in the future. However,we should never feel obligated but take the opportunities when they present themselves..
I know for sure that I can get the bit between my teeth and be determined to finish something myself. I can push away anyone who really wants to lighten the load. I want to “do it myself” like a three year old.
When people turn us away from helping it is difficult to know when is the right time to push and when we should just back away. I really can’t guess myself. It is an individual determination. I wish I had some crystal ball but I don’t. I do know that there are times that I have had to back away or lose any chance to remain a friend or help later.
Our church makes up bags of goodies for homeless people. It has a variety of items in it…some food items, hygiene things (like toothbrush) and a $5.00 bill. I try to have one in my car at all times. Several places that I stop at a light there are people wanting a hand out of some sort. Every single person that I hand a bag to has said “thank you and God bless you.” I know the bags don’t solve the problem but even small things can make a difference.
If you can manage it keep something in your car to give to those in need. It doesn’t have to be as complex as what the church makes up but it will be received with gratitude. I have a friend that has some small food items she carries. For those who are hurting anything will help. Add a note with a kind thought to it. “God loves you, you are important, you matter.” Whatever you can come up with. Those notes do make a difference.