Not at home yet

find the roadThere are some times when I wear my feelings on my shoulders. Since coming back to my husband’s church I have not really felt at home there. It is not anything about the church but about me. After 20 years of working in a church there is so much I could share but I can’t. I offer to help and usually end up stepping on someones toes. Other people need space to do things…my turn is past. I don’t want to be in charge if anything…just offer experience. Even after several years I feel as if part of me is missing. The only change has to be made by me. (the hardest person to change)

The frustration I experience when I am at the church is painful. The best thing may be to go somewhere else for a while where I don’t feel that pull. If everything is unfamiliar I may not have such a strong reaction. At least it is worth trying to see if it helps.

As we get older we have so much to share and don’t often get the opportunity to do so. This blog has been a wonderful way to at least offer my experiences in the hope that they may help others. It has kept me centered and moving forward. This is a blessing.



9 thoughts on “Not at home yet

  1. Excellent reflection upon your experience. Even though sometimes, the process can feel unsettling. That means it was worth exploring since ultimately, everything begins and ends inside ourselves. I love that free-will option.


  2. I felt comfortable in English churches. We went to so many here in Florida, and couldn’t find what we were looking for.
    We found it a few years back, when staying in Treasure island. St. Albans is the most welcoming church, and it feels like home ⛪


    1. So true. I read yesterday that there is a study on using green light to reduce pain and migraines. The researcher got the idea from his brother who sat outdoors in the greenery to stop a migraine. It seems to be working.

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