I didn’t write yesterday as I came home exhausted from taking a class on Community Conferencing. This is a program that works with the school, courts, police, to deflect teens with offences to a resolution process instead of getting them into the system. The trainers told us that where they are teens who have been through this process are 60% less likely to re-offend. I will see how this works for me.
One of the people who was also training told us about a way she looks at people’s differences and how they live. She broke it down into this.
Tolerance: She is tolerant of how others live and their opinions.
Acceptance: She will accept that the way may not be her way.
Approval: This is where she steps back and feels she doesn’t have to approve.
This makes so much sense to me. I may not agree with you but I can be tolerant about your life and your opinions and accept that you want to live that way but I don’t have to approve of it.
This is a way to break it down into pieces and be a tolerant and accepting person without agreeing with what it is. There are people who I love but cannot approve of their lifestyle. For me, it is usually when I see it as hurtful to them or others.
This may not work or help some people but for me It was sort of an “aha” moment. Another tool to put in my toolbox and help me understand and move on.
With thanks to Yolandra for this insight!
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