Violence breeds violence

children sacrifice

I was scheduled for a Community Conference this morning. The child involved did not show up. We were told that the mother is usually the problem with this particular child. For me that is really sad. The child’s case will go back to juvenile court to be dealt with. It is awful that this mother cares so little for her child that she would let the child enter the Juvenile Court System rather than find other solutions and have the case closed. If they had appeared we would have worked to find options for reparations that did not include going to court.

It just makes me want to find this mother and tell her to get her priorities in order. Of course that would do no good. So many children are with parents who are uncaring or so self absorbed that the children don’t matter. Some of the parents solve problems by themselves getting in fights or some other unacceptable way of handling things.

Hate-begets-hate violence-begets-violence-toughness-begets-a-greater-toughness.-We-must-meet-the-forces-of-hate...-Martin-Luther-KIng

We have to begin teaching conflict resolution in elementary school to try and stop this. Children learn what they see and do what their parents do. It would be good to offer a class for the parents as well and hopefully change what the children are exposed to.

Violence breeds violence.

Early to bed!

early to bed

Tomorrow I have to be up at “0 dark 30” to facilitate a Community Conference that starts at 7:45! My husband laughed when he heard this. I am usually not up until 7:30 in the winter. In the summer I can be up because the sun is up. I am totally sun oriented. I told the person who assigned me this that they owe me BIG!

Time was when I was at the hospital before 7 am but those days are far behind me. YEA! Being retired allows me to set my own schedule and I don’t do early morning. Oh well,….early to bed etc.

Today was a yard work day so I am already tired and going to bed early will be perfect.

enough money

They must be taught

This week I have been assigned two Community Conference cases. After reading the information on both of them I am amazed at what teachers are dealing with. I don’t know how anyone can teach in an environment with so many problems. From my recent experience I see so much violence erupting in the schools. Students get in arguments and their way of solving them is to get in a fight. This is not high school….this is middle school.

angry child
violence is learned

The environment of violence that we live in today is being played out by children! This is how they have learned to react. They have no experience with other ways to handle disputes and disagreements. We have to find ways to break the cycle. The Mediation Center does have a program that goes into the schools and teaches groups how to mediate a dispute and there are peer groups that are trying to help.

This culture of violence will continue until we teach alternatives to young children and help them to be played out in Elementary School. We have to stop it early.

Pay attention to health

This week I have been asked to do one mediation and 2 community conferences. I wanted to start back but wow! They have cases that must be done asap and someone has the flu. it will be a challenge but also interesting.

The-Long-Term-Effects-Of-Paying-Attention-To-Your-Health

I am also taking control of my health after the surgery and the shift of not having a thyroid. It is taking some rethinking on my part but I have realized that I have been taking my health for granted.  I am now watching my diet and getting back to eating well…back to walking the dogs for exercise for all of us. They even seemed tired after walking today. I guess we all need to get back to reality.

health hope

It is so easy to slip and let important things get away from you. The holiday season didn’t help but really it was up to me. We have to pay attention and not let the things that keep us well be ignored.

It’s a privilege

Helping someone you love is not a burden. It is an opportunity to show gratitude.   ? from the two popes ?

I wrote this quote down without putting the author but I think that’s where I got it.

It really made me think. In today’s society we have a large aging population. People are living longer. More are having to be cared for. How many of us would be willing to take on what we may see as a burden. If we were blessed enough to have loving parents we need to remember the time, energy and love put into raising us.

I know I didn’t do enough for my parents. I did help and care for my mother and my aunt but they were not unable to care for themselves most of the time. Sometimes I feel guilty for the things I didn’t do to make their lives easier. Like most of us I was involved with my job, my family and my own agenda.

helping people

 

 

Those we love are not a burden and it should be a privilege to serve them and show our gratitude.

Don’t give up

Life is an amazing journey. I my lifetime I have married, raised children, sent them out of the nest, welcomed grandchildren and now great-grandchildren. I have worked several jobs, had a great career and ended doing the one thing that married my vocation with my greatest passion.

the amazing journey
the amazing journey

I have lived but I (God willing) have years in me left to pursue other goals. Those of you who have been reading my blog know that one of my goals is to share experiences, offer solace and kindness, information, and ideas that I have gained over the years.

I have also made strides in controlling my tendency to worry myself into anxiety. I continue to grow each day and owe much thanks to the others who deal with this issue and have offered support and suggestions for conquering it.

In the scheme of things it is probably that something fought with over a lifetime will not disappear entirely but learned skills do help in catching escalation to the “tipping point.”

The trick is to keep trying things and find what works for you. Each of us will have different things that help. Just keep trying. There is something out there that will be the thing that helps you turn the corner. Our mental health issues can, many time, be lessened or averted with the right tools.

Anonymous-quote-Inspirational-quote-Theres-always-hope-even-when-you-are-at-the-lowest-point-of-your-life.-Keep-believing

Never give up. Just keep on trying. Also don’t think you are alone. There are many of us and we truly understand.

Keep helping

Laziness has invaded my space. This week has had changes but has really been quieter than usual. I have to get back to all the things I was doing. I haven’t called to get back on the schedule for Community Conferencing or Mediation. Next week will be the get going time.

doing nothing

It can be easy to sit back and do nothing. Just be the person who meets people for lunch and is a dilettante. Really not my thing. If I don’t get back doing what I can to help I will end up being insipid.

If all of those who are retired stopped doing volunteer work it would definitely be missed. Ninety percent of the people at the mediation center are retired and I’m sure that can be said of many places where help is needed. We have to keep on helping.

 

Change AGAIN!

It is amazing to me that things can be going along perfectly and the something throws the whole thing out of whack. This week has been like that so far. It is time to regroup and rethink.

change-aversion-conflicted-user-lead

Life is never boring. There is always something that brings excitement whether it is good or bad. The trick is learning to back up, accept the changes and move forward again. Even the good things can move you off track. As someone who like routine I am always surprised by changes. It is as if my brain doesn’t even put it in as a possibility. My husband used to go to work at 6:30 in the morning when he wasn’t due until eight. He said he got lots of work done before everything started to fall apart. He planned for changes.

change accept

 

 

Maybe leaving room for changes would help to keep me from being stressed by them. Just plan a space for things to be different than I planned. Even if that space is not on paper but only in my mind. Those of us who like order and lists resent changes. I think I will put “change” down on my list for each day.

When the truth can hurt

Truth may be vital but without love it is unbearable. from “The Two Popes.”

We can get ourselves into a moral dilemma sometimes. We may find out something that we feel we need to tell someone but it may destroy their world. What to do?

tell the truth

Information is important but so is caring about others. It is just hard to know when to share that information and when not to. What if you know that someone is having an affair and you are friends with the other spouse? To tell or not tell…..that is the question.

There are lots of other moral scenarios where we may be called to judge if telling is worth the harm it can cause. Truth is good but love has to be considered.

The light is on!

Today in church we celebrated the Epiphany…the bringing of light into the world. The read date is the 9th but we did it today. I am addicted to light. It influences how I feel. I enjoy the months when we have the most light. That doesn’t mean that I don’t enjoy the night. One without the other would be meaningless.

This started me thinking of all the idioms that use the word light. See if you can come up with these. Have fun!

light bulb

sweetness and light

light-at-the-end-of-the-tunnel-michal-boubin

feather-falling-light-small-white

very-funny-dog-and-kid-sleeping-together-picture

limelight-feature

do-we-have-to-light-a-fire-under-your-butt-5624838