A tough time

It has been so long since I have written that I feel lost. I think the straw that broke the camels back fell on me. I hate to say it but I don’t remember but one other time in my life when I felt so miserable. My IBSD is out of control even though I have tried one round of medicine. I have asked for a second round. I am praying that I will not have to go through all the gastro tests to get this under control.

For those who read my blogs you know that this IBSD triggers my anxiety and panic attacks. I think that all of this is related to all that has happened but also with having a new doctor who doesn’t treat the same and doesn’t understand the meds that I need. He doesn’t want to proscribe the way that I am used to and then when I need meds he doesn’t agree with what I am asking him. He did get a letter from my previous doctor but I don’t know that it has helped.

For most of my life I have managed to stay off any meds whenever I can and don’t ask for them unless necessary. I reduce them as soon as possible but I don’t think he believes that. I will be searching for someone who will understand and hope to find one soon.

In the meantime I have such an assortment of meds that it is really crazy. I won’t go into the whole list but I have way too much of things that only help slightly and not enough of the ones I need.

Sorry for the hard post but I am frustrated and ill and need prayers and support. I want to get back to myself.

8 thoughts on “A tough time

  1. You are in my prayers. I am always worried that I will have a panic attack and black out for 2 minutes, like I did 3 weeks after Len died.

    We are strong, we have got this far. 🙏❤️🤗

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  2. Never apologize for what you post. We are here to support you. Who knows, maybe one of your readers can offer you guidance. Wouldn’t that be a blessing? Once you get into the IBSD/anxiety/panic cycle, it is very difficult to break which is why the right medication is important. Until then, it must feel like you are chasing your tail. I will pray for you and am here when you need me.

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  3. I am so sorry, Suzanne. It is so miserable when one knows their body, knows what is wrong with it, knows what it needs and are stuck with a doctor who is too arrogant or uncaring to listen. I will definitely keep you in my prayers.


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