Sometimes it is hard to see the good. Sometimes the down side is so much more visible. I live in a wonderful place. I can want for nothing but I still feel disconnected. With a partner I had what I saw as a life of connections. Picked my own directions…did my own thing. I can still do that but I didn’t realize how disconnected I would feel from the lives of my family.
They were raised to find their own way…to make their own choices and they have done a wonderful job of that. But they frequently called with updates and questions. I knew about their lives. I was connected.
Now I am in a safe, prime environment and for some reason I have become disconnected. Is is me? Am I not functioning the way I used to?
I guess in some ways I was the matriarch. My home was still the center. Now that is gone. In some ways it is a relief to not have that role but I realize I miss it. Something else to absorb and learn to accept. It is the way of life. Each generation moves on and leaves room for the next.
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